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Welcome to another adventure from the Thousand Acre Woods deep within Trollheim of the NJ Pine Belt! Tales Chronicled by Jonathan Hulton. A tale about a daughter who is forced to hang out with her embarrassing father while a tricky serpent is trying to steal their bait, a whole ox.

 

Angrboðaoda and Bjorn left for a father daughter fishing trip. Along the way Angrboða stopped to tow an ox.

"You know Thor only used the head?" said the father Nattroll.

"Did he fricassee him."

"No Hymr cut the line-"

"When the Ox keeps his head, he proves enough consistency of mind to walk the serpent to shore." she said. " By the way, his smile is way too cute."

So the three of them continued to Duck's Pond.

Then she tied the ox to the faering and he pulled them out into the middle. She unfastened the ox and threw him a sugar cube while attaching her rod.

Bjorn pulled his friendly little worm from his home, a little hinged pine box. The worm sat on the hook. The fishing line was then dropped in the water.

Being a troll himself, the Great Horned Serpent shrunk down to the size of a worm to pass under the rivulet, separating the two halves of Duck’s Pond, through the cedar shaft that emptied into the concrete spa in the middle of the rivulet. The Serpent noticed the sweet smell of oxen in the air.

You could see the serpent's tail wagging above the water when he entered the next pond.

When he poked his head up he stoped to ponder, for he saw Bjorn and his daughter. Bjorn was easy enough to get the best of, but Angrboðaoda has proved to all she was the queen of tricksters. He was going to have to earn his supper through his ‘super genius’ skills.

As Bjorn was fishing for pickerel, Angrboðaoda was tossing sugar cubes to the ox. Bjorn caught three already. Each time the worm jumped off the hook at the right moment. Each release, Bjorn was careful don't to disturb the slime that protected their body. Each fish was thankful for a well played game and Bjorn was thankful for the fight they put up.

Angrboðaoda was scratching the ox behind the ear as the Great Horned Serpent sneaked up on them. He was ready to strike—but thought better of it. He was going to use his brains and bide his time.

“Did you hear the story about the three fish?” asked Bjorn while he was placing his friendly little worm on his line again.

“Not another one dad...”

“There was this poacher dropping his line into this deep sinkhole where the Emperor’s three finest koi lived. The smartest of the three jumped out and held his breath pretending to be dead. The fisherman thinking the fish was dead pushed him back in.

“The first fish explained his plan to the second, but when he jumped out he forgot to hold his breath. The fisherman threw the fish in his basket. When he bent over the fish jumped out. They told the last fish it was important to hold his breath when he jumped out.

“This time the fisherman didn’t want to lose three fish in one day and brought him home to feed to the cat.”

“What does that even mean?” Angrboðaoda snapped at him disturbing the ox. “I prefer the story with the three guys who slept in the barn who disguised themselves as a cat and the third gets shot saying ‘Don’t shoot its the cat’—Both a tale about a possible killer that ends with a cat.”

“There are three types of people. One who hears in one ear and its bounces around in his skull and fizzles out. The second type hears in one ear and raises an eyebrow before it goes right out the other ear. The third listens and the words go straight to their heart.”

“I got one for you,” Angrboðaoda say as she turns on her father, “Who has it better? I have my hand in a latrine and you have your hand in a pot of honey.”

“If I didn’t know you, I would say you had it worse.”

“The truth be told you had the poop end of the stick because the universe decreed you had to lick my hand and I had to lick yours.”

While the pair was arguing the Great Horned Serpent decided to shrink down to the size of a pickerel and eat the ox from the inside—right before the ox went to swallow the fish, Bjorn grabbed him.

“I must say this is the first time I got the best of you,” said Bjorn gleefully.

“You must be standing besides yourself— though I got a bargain for you.” said the old serpent.

“What would that be?”

“I will tell you three profound truths in exchange for my freedom.”

“OK.”

“First I am a fish.”

“Obviously.”

“Second, you said you would free me if I told you three truths.”

“You must be kidding...”

“Third, you expected to hear only what you wanted. I only promised three profound truths.”

“How were any of them profound?”

“Well it was quite intense to transform into a fish, I almost had great in-sight into your ox, and I had a deeply intense feeling to save my own life.”

“So Dad you spent half of your life to learning these stupid stories just to have this fish get the best of you again—you’re lucky he didn’t tell you the pond, sky, and my eyes are blue...”

It was then that the Great Serpent began to grow to his full size capsizing the boat.

“Well my daughter, do you know how to swim?”

“Why?” she said as she was falling into the water.

“Because you are about to lose the rest of your life,” answered Bjorn.

Bjorn swam to shore. When Bjorn scratched his head he found his friend the worm. His box was still in his pocket and he placed him back in his home. The ox lifted his head under Angrboðaoda and brought her out. Then they walked home with the daughter on his back.

 

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